March 24, 2011

Today reminds me of how sad my wedding day will be.

My mom has been passed away for 16 months now and it's getting easier. Except today. It's her 45th birthday.

And I just keep thinking in less than 9 months I will be getting married and she won't be there. She won't see the father daughter dance, me getting all dressed up for the big day, or even to take family photos with. It's not something I can change and I'm learning to deal with it even more day by day. It's just hard. I have to rely on the future mil to do all of the things my mom should have been doing, like throwing my bridal shower. Instead, none of that will be shared with her. And it hurts really bad.

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